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I don’t like it.  I mean really, really do not like it.  Being in charge of my life is important.  My entire philosophy is based upon being in charge of my own reality…creating my own world.  Sometimes that just doesn’t happen though.  I don’t mind not being in control, for letting other things take the lead is part of the process.  But feeling truly helpless sucks.  I felt that way tonight.  In the grand scheme of things it wasn’t a big deal at all…  Nothing seriously bad.  But my inability to do a damn thing is something that’s hard to handle for me.  What do you do when all you want to do is fix something but nothing you do can possibly help?  Luckily this doesn’t happen too often and I rarely feel even close to helpless.  But that makes it all the more terrible when it happens!

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